Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Stupid Cupid


You’d think being a romance writer I’d love Valentine’s Day. You’d think wrong. Red roses and heart-shaped boxes of candy kind of bore me. Of course, once my husband got creative and gave me a table for the cellar so I could fold laundry. That wasn’t a great Valentine’s present either. He’s since been instructed that anything practical or electrical is verboten.

I still get flashbacks from elementary school Valentine’s parties. We’d decorate our own boxes and then count up how many cards we got. It was the end of the world if you didn’t get the right number, or a card from your crush. Nowadays I’m sure kids are instructed to hand out Valentines to every single person in the class, if they are permitted to celebrate at all. I worked in an elementary school where the principal said you couldn’t have a party unless you made a rubric showing what you expected the kids to learn from it. Seriously. Uh---arranged plate with precision? Didn’t spill punch? Laughed when appropriate?

For some unromantic Valentine’s fun, visit this anagram site. You too can wish someone a Happy Valentine’s Day is a unique way. Heavenly Tipsy Panda! Nipple Savant Heyday! Dainty Heavens Apply! And my favorite: Apathy and Pensively.

Do you have any sweet Valentine stories? I’ll take sour ones, too. Any fun anagrams?

Congratulations to my Virtual 100th Blog Party guest Marnee Jo! E-mail me your address (maggierobinson8@yahoo.com) to get your party favor! Thank you 100 times to each of you for gracing me with your presence and not spilling your punch. You all get an A+.

20 comments:

RevMelinda said...

Maggie, my husband is the complete Valentine contrarian, Mr "We-don't-have-to-participate- in-that-Valentine-hype" who says "I do nice things for you every day, why should I buy you meaningless flowers that'll just be dead next week?"

So very sad (shedding a gentle tear).

(PS can you come visit my blog? I don't write fab entries like you but I did put a new little widget on there that makes a dot for each visitor. It's a lonely little map so far. . .)

Tiffany Kenzie said...

I like valentines. The hubby hates it. I therefore have no good valentines story. The day usually ends up with me grumpy.

I love flowers, roses or otherwise. Lets see if the hubby remembers this year! I won't hold my breath.

Maggie Robinson said...

LOL, RevM. When my husband gave me flowers for my 40th birthday, they died the next DAY. I thought it was an omen. But like yours, mine is day-to-day thoughtful, so I think we should be contented with our lot.

Every body go visit RevM's blog (Only Connect---it's on my blogroll)! She may claim she's not a "writer," but I dispute that. And she's a fellow Raybourn fanatic. So maybe she's not a romance writer, but her sermons actually make you want to go to church. Sorry, my heathen past is coming out.

Tiff, don't get grumpy. I was just reading how bogus the whole Valentine holiday is somewhere. Good for business but not especially good for love!

Tiff

Tiff,

Maggie Robinson said...

I don't know where those extra Tiffs came from, but you can never have too many Tiffs.

Tiffany Kenzie said...

lol! tiff tiff tiff... lol! I get grumpy cause the hubby is never really romantic. Okay he cooks, helps the kids with homework but there is no suck thing as a romantic gesture from him. maybe on my birthday. I want romance! I write romance, I want WANT romance..lol! Is that too much to ask? Obviously it is. lol!

terrio said...

I can't think of any good Valentines but I remember a bad one. When I was married (come on, you knew that was coming lol) my ex and I went out with his sister and her husband. We'd planned a nice dinner out.

By the end of the night it's a wonder it took another year or so for both me and my sister-in-law to file for divorce from our respective worse halves. It was like going on a double date with Beevis and Butthead. I can't think of how they could have been more offensive or obnoxious. Gah! Boys are stupid.

Maggie Robinson said...

Terrio, you remind me of something my son wrote on a wall when he was about 6. "Girls are stopid. So is Sarah (his sister)." Yes, stopid. Now who was the stupid one, LOL? We tease him about it all the time. I believe they sell "Boys are stupid" T-shirts. My son actually custom-designs shirts in Key West and could furnish you one, I don't doubt. He spells better now, too.

Tiff, I truly believe most men don't have the romance gene, but if yours is helpful, keep him!

irisheyes said...

Now that we're married my DH pretty much feels the same way as all of yours - Valentine's Day is a commercial business rip-off. But when we were dating, I always got a card and more often than not a cute little gift. He does do stuff day to day for me so I don't really sweat the Valentine's Day thing. I buy a little something (this year it's chocolate Dove roses) for him and my 2 kids and put it in front of them at breakfast.

This is the last year I have to go out and buy Valentine's for school. You are right, Maggie, they have to have enough for the whole class! Which, IMO, is only right, especially when you are in grade school. Kids can be mean enough without giving them an opportunity to really stick it to you.

The middle school student council sells candygrams for 25 cents each and you can give them to whomever you choose. This is the first year for this, so we'll see if we have hurt feelings after Thursday! I am so not ready to suffer through another couple of rounds of teenage angst via my children. I barely made it out alive when I went through it all the first time!

Janga said...

I remember those Valentine boxes too, Maggie, and everybody counting to see who got the most. We couldn't have spelled popularity at six, but we were already in the race.

It was worse when I taught high school, and the Key Club sold roses. Saddest were the girls who lacked either the guile or the cash to make certain that were not left roseless even if they were loverless.

MsHellion said...

I *loathe* Valentine's Day. *LOL* And it's from childhood, where we weren't required to give cards to *everyone* and I usually came up short. *LOL* And definitely never a special one from the crush. (I think his mother made sure she gave one to EVERYONE, but I got one of the Valentines that didn't mean anything. "You're SWEET" or something stupid like that.)

I love how you had to justify what kids learn to at a party. They learn to be SOCIALIZED, nitwit. Jeez!

The only time I had a boyfriend during the valentine season, I got 6 BOXES of chocolate, roses, a card...and dinner out. Of course, he turned out to be gay--so I think the chocolate was to make up for the fact we weren't going to have sex.

This Valentine's I'll be sending flowers to my best friend, addressed from "Will" (her name choice) and she'll send me some from Jack. I know that's vaguely pathetic, but we love flowers--so we're going with it. I wish men would remember that when they say things like "They DIE." Yes, well, you'll die too, but I'd like to have YOU around at least for the short time I can.

MsHellion said...

*LOL* That's so deadon. "We couldn't spell popularity at age six, but we were already in the race."!!!! *ROTFLMAO*

terrio said...

I'm still laughing over the comeback "well, you'll die too." LMAO!!!

Maggie Robinson said...

Irish, you will survive. You'll have to. It will not be a picnic, though. I'm surrounded right now by 800+ high school kids---I'm so glad my own are grown.

Janga, sometimes I think high schools as we know them should be abolished. The whole popularity thing is tough. But I am mindful that even the popular kids don't like themseleves much either.

Hellion, I knew you'd find this topic worthy of your special spin. Loved your post. Hope Jack sends you plenty of undead flowers!

MistyJo said...

Some of you may remember that my DH did the rose one the bedside table and the Hinder cd. When I turned the ignition in my vehicle, "Lips of an Angel" began playing. I had wanted that cd forever. *sigh* Very romantic.

This year he is showing loving devotion again. Instead of celebrating Valentine's with me, he has elected to be very generous to my 14 year-old daughter and me. He's obtained a pair of tickets to the Reba and Kelly Clarkson concert scheduled near us on Valentine's night. So, instead of being curled up next to the DH, my daughter and I will be singing the lyrics to "Since You Been Gone" at the top of our lungs.

He's reserved the right to celebrate Valentine's with me on another night.

Not to sound mushy, but I never really had spectacular Valentine days until Bill. Each year he tries to make it special, which is difficult since it is just 8 days after my birthday. Gifts have ranged from flowers, books, Beauty and the Beast stuff, to a Henry VIII coffee mug that makes his six wives disappear when a hot liquid is added.

I'm one lucky gal.

Maggie Robinson said...

Ha, Misty Jo, we're all grumbling darkly now in roiling jealousy. Bill sounds like a pretty good guy! Do you know, I bet the only Valentine card I get this year will be from you, LOL. Loved it!Thanks for Johnny. Don't tell Hellion he's mine now.

Santa said...

Here! Here! on abolishing the whole high school thing! Can we get rid of adolescence and puberty too?

What were we talking about? Ah, yes, VD Day! Can you tell I'm not a big fan? My DH and I don't really celebrate but our kids think we should. Go out on a date (who wants to eat in a crowded restaurant to be rushed through a meal) or buy diamonds for one each other (not one I'd quibble with). So because they get such a kick out of those singing cards - we'll exchange them with much fanfare (read squealing children and barking dog).

RevMelinda said...

Thank you to everyone who came to visit my blog! The little map widget is much happier now. And yes Maggie, that is my yahoo'd self (they don't make avatars plus-size enough for true accuracy, however). And I am thrilled that you read my sermons and like them!

My husband gave me roses when we were dating--19 years ago! Where, oh where, has the romance gone?

Can I trade husbands with MistyJo? Just for Valentine's Day? (Mine will wash your car, do the dishes, and vacuum for you. . .)

No wonder I read romance novels, sigh.

irisheyes said...

MistyJo - that's awesome. Your husband sounds great. I think it's great that you appreciate what you've got!

Hellion - I think you and your friend's idea is awesome! I think Valentine's Day should be more about making someone special to you feel special. That's why I try to do something every year for my kids and my mom.

Janga - you are full of awesome insights this week! LOL My DH and I disagree about this stuff all the time. I was the kid in the corner no one ever noticed, where he was the nice guy buying flowers for all his girl friends. We had two totally different experiences - mine negative, his positive. I still think in school situations the establishment should be looking out for the kids who aren't as popular. I don't think my opinion is a popular one.

Maggie Robinson said...

Santa, I'm with you---and I want to know why I still get pimples when I'm waaay past puberty.

RevM, we're all going to fight over Bill. You'll have to wait your turn.

Irish,I find the comments here to be continuously first-class! And I'm so glad you all take the time to visit. :)

J.K. Coi said...

Oh you guys are completely right. Men just don't have the gene. Unless they're reminded about it, prompted to do it, or held at gun point. Case in point: my husband actually said to me on Monday "Um, I don't have to get you something for this crappy holiday...right?"

To which I replied with " "
Yes, dead silence.

(He was kind of kidding, I know that. And he did write me a beautiful poem, so I don't mind at all--See post on Writer's Life RE: Everyday good stuff done by the husband)